It only gets crazier…

crazy woman, flashing, drunk woman, glasses, nutsThe last week or so has been quite “crazy” in the emergency room. For some unknown reason, the ER has been packed with psych patients on a daily basis. This particular day was no different. I’m in the hallway with a guy who checked in saying he’s homicidal (he turned out to be really nice, as well as respectful.)

All of a sudden, I see a gal to my left, standing in front of the nurses station- screaming at the charge nurse. It’s hard to make out what she’s saying because she’s talking to so fast and aggressively- but I do hear her say, “have you ever been strangled?” The charge nurse makes his way around the desk to try to calm the situation.

Next thing I know- the gal yells out- “Do I have to give you my vagina?” No sooner than the absurdity is off her lips, her sweatpants come flying off and she is completely naked from the waste down, screaming at the top of her lungs! This is definitely a first for me- and the guy that I’m taking care of- she’s baring her nether regions in front of the whole emergency room, and she doesn’t seem to care one bit. She’s put on a gurney and wheeled into a private room in order to contain the chaos that she’s creating.

Hours later, I’m in the hallway- watching a couple of mental health patients. One gal has been yelling out obscenities for hours- making just about zero sense. She’s insulted me- “Shutup white boy, I’m mostly italian,” she says. “I have hepatitis C, not AIDS- that was a rumor.”  Every word she utters, she puts her diaphragm behind- to give it that extra ummph. “I’m not a whore Justin,” whoever Justin was…

Later, our strip- teasing, pyscho friend ends up in a bed right next to the woman who’s turned into a disturbing alert system…and the screamer is still going strong. The stripper has clearly had enough of the nonsense and sits up to address her.

“Can you please STOP! I’m trying to eat. When I get worked up, I start to CHOKE! So can you please STOP!”

Wow….I couldn’t believe the reprimand I was hearing and I was waiting for a fight to break out. Instead, the screamer just says, “OK, I’m sorry.” She didn’t totally shutup after that but it was a marked improvement. I was just glad to have a little less chaos.

If you’re crazy enough to rip off your pants in a public place and scream in a grown man’s face-naked from the waste down…you’re probably crazy enough to beat the crap out of a fellow patient that’s annoying you. I’m figuring the screamer realized this as well and heeded the warning. Good times.

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